Lest I Forget

Outside my window... is my own little patch of land. I am already dreaming of how to plant it in the spring. Maybe an herb garden under the kitchen window. For the veggies, I may make several small raised garden beds. Oh, warm weather, please hurry up! I am thinking... of all the changes 2010 will bring to my family. I am thankful for... a safe return from my parents house. I am wearing... sweats, socks, and my glasses. It's early and we got home late last night. I am remembering... how well all the cousins played together. They are good friends. I am currently reading...my Magnificat. We finally finished "A Tale of Two Cities". Next up for literature is "Crime and Punishment". I read with Sophie and Olivia because I have never read most of the books assigned to the girls. For myself, though, I just bought "An Introduction to the Devout Life". I am eagerly awaiting to open its cover and begin. I am hoping. Still. On my mind... organizing the house. I ...

In the dark, cold night, my husband and older girls worked hard to assemble a surprise for the little ones. They are at this very moment bundling up to go try out their early Christmas gift. For breakfast this morning, I decided to use up the leftover squash from the other night's dinner. Thank you Rebekah for this delicious recipe . I made the double batch like she suggested so our Christmas Eve breakfast will be just as scrumptious without all the labor (or the smoke that set off the detector! I tried to fit it all on one cookie sheet, which I wouldn't recommend.) May God Bless you all this day.

FOR TODAY(December 21)... Outside my window...the remnants of our snowy weekend. A crisp, cloudless sky. Trees with their last lingering leaves. The sun just peaking over the roofs. I am thinking...that this is the most calm and relaxed I have ever been with Christmas just days away. I am thankful for...a husband who can laugh after digging through the recycling in the freezing, dark night, searching for his keys only to have his wife find them in his jacket pocket! From the learning rooms...quiet. We will tie up loose ends this morning and then school will be out until the new year. From the kitchen...a tin delivered last night by our neighbors. Inside...delectable sweets. We are so blessed to live across the street from one of the best dessert makers in the world. Plus their family is as sweet as the goodies they brought over! I am wearing...warm, fuzzy fleece pj's and slippers. I am creating...Anna's sweater. Both sleeves are finished and I have started on the body. I am goi...

Before: no knobs was making me nuts! Tony has everything on the counter and ready to go! After: I think it makes such a nice difference, plus I can easily get in the cabinets! While finishing the cabinets, the kids noticed something strange outside. SNOW!!! A first for Jack and Anna. Their squeals of delight, running from window to window made my heart dance. Thank goodness Tony and I went out and found the tree earlier that day. As the flakes fell, my family decorated the tree in the cozy warmth of our new house. This ornament was given to us the Christmas after Ben died. A beautiful poem accompanied the delicate blue heart and makes me cry each year when I read it. My kiddos posing for the traditional Christmas photo. This morning before heading out to Mass, I bundled up the little ones and we actually were able to make a tiny little snowman! Then Olivia and Tony joined us for a lively snowball fight. I think he's cute! Now, can I get some cards ready to send to those close to...

--1-- This week our parish hosted an Advent Mission. One evening, there was an elderly gentleman beside us. Everything about him gave the impression of a quiet, gentle soul. But his eyes told me he had seen many things. His eyes were soulful and doleful, deep brown, and they made me want to know his tale. --2-- The man at the mission made me wonder if people can tell by looking at me that I am broken. Some days I don't want to go out because I think that people will be able to see my heart through my eyes. I want to spread joy to others, with a smile and a kind word, yet some days I need those smiles to be aimed at me. And maybe a hug, too. --3-- The mission priest answered a burning question for me. He said that the moment we stop telling stories of someone who has died, that is when they truly die. I hope people don't grow tired of me remembering Ben through retelling his stories, for they keep me alive as well. --4-- I love making bread from scratch. I always picture ...

This morning, Jack played an entire game of Candyland. He sat nicely and played properly, taking turns, "reading" his card, and even stayed put during a potty break for one of the other players. This may not seem like much to anyone else, but to me it is a major accomplishment.

FOR TODAY( December 14)... Outside my window ... a fog as thick as the tension in an awkward conversation. I am thinking ... of the busy day ahead. I am thankful for ...kids who cook dinner while my husband and I search for holiday items. I am wearing ... navy sweatshirt, polka-dot pj pants, and knee socks. I am remembering ... the message of last night's speaker at the Advent Mission at our Church. I am going ... to pick up the girls from their early morning workout and take breakfast to my husband. I am currently reading ... STILL A Tale of Two Cities, but I will finish! I am hoping ... to be a better role model for my children. On my mind ... so many things that if one could peek inside my brain, I am sure it would look like a whirlwind. Pondering these words ... "This is why I speak to you, so you can become aware of these people who are calling out to you....Are you aware that in your own family, ....there may be someone who is very lonely, who feels unloved or hurt?...

A dear friend of mine graciously sends us books when she and her daughter are done with them. This was how we were introduced to these books . Anna enjoys these books (and so do I!) Laura would bring her plate to Ma to receive a pancake man. I have always brought the pancakes to the table as they come fresh and hot off the griddle, but now Anna stands there patiently with plate held under her chin, her big round blue eyes twinkling with anticipation as I slide a pancake man (or bunny) onto the plate. Then she fairly skips to the table. It is a new tradition for us, but it also hearkens back to my own weekend mornings when my mother, who is way more artistic than her daughter, would make pancake shapes to order. We would call out our wish, and then there it would be on our plate. This morning, after the pancake men were made, I started on the round variety for the rest of us. Usually I grab a bigger spoon for these pancakes since they do not require much precision. But I forgot. So the ...

--1-- I got up early this morning, tip-toed down the stairs so as not to wake any little people, and sat in my comfy chair in front of our home altar with my Magnificat in hand. What a lovely way to start this chilly day! --2-- Tony and the two older girls have gotten up even earlier than me and left in the dark to exercise. This was my husband's idea and I think it is a great one. Before the move, we were members of the local rec department and would swim on a regular basis. We have not been very physically active these last months and it shows on all of us. --3-- One of the "perks" of being a military family is the Commissary. The prices are generally lower than in the local grocery stores. There is one rule of thumb however. Avoid shopping on a pay day at all costs. Since I go once a week, I don't always notice the date. Recently, as I scoured the picked over shelves, I had to buy orange juice with "some pulp" and bring it to a decidedly pulp-free family....

Sitting at the classroom table, I often get frustrated with the clutter that accumulates during the week. Random half-finished papers, leftovers from crafts, stray pony-tail holders, pencils, books not in use, and that is only the top layer. So this morning I decided to tidy up while Sophie rewrote a sentence for me from her vocabulary lesson. What I found under the clutter took my breath away...there in the wood, carved with a compass, was a portrait done by an artist that definitely knows the difference between art mediums and a piece of furniture. I drew in a breath, ready to let loose my anger. I said about three words and stopped. I walked up the stairs to relay the event to Tony and then came downstairs calmly. For the crime, I assigned a paper with a relevant topic. Backing up just a bit, when I asked why she had done this, she told me a whopper of a lie and claimed it was an accident. I wanted part of the paper to focus on why it is better to tell the truth than to compound thi...

From my magnificat this morning... "Lord our God, you sent your prophets to call all people to abandon their unfaithful pursuits and to return to you with all their hearts in preparation for the day of your coming." As I drifted off to sleep last night, I was thinking how I desire to change some habits of mine that I feel are preventing me from coming closer to our Lord as well as keeping me from being a better mom and wife. The analogy my drowsy mind thought of was this: I am driving life's roads. I can see the exit ramps that will lead me where I desire to be, but there are these barriers that block my way. They are labeled with these hinderances with which I struggle. How does one take that "leap of faith" and shed the old ways? For that is what God is daily, gently calling me to do. This morning, I took a little "hop." I got up this morning before the children woke me and went downstairs to my home altar, where I read the morning readings in the Ma...

FOR TODAY (December 7)... Outside my window ...Frost on the roof of the neighbors house, which is sparkling in the morning sun. I am thinking... about where I could have placed my Magnificat and the gift card from Target. Why, oh why do I feel the need to appear like an immaculate housekeeper and shove things out of sight? I am thankful for... getting most of the presents bought while spending time with my husband. From the learning rooms... school uniforms are on and morning prayers are being said. From the kitchen... cookbooks will be opened and poured over to decide which cookies to make for Christmas. My mother is not fond of desserts (how is that possible?) so a tradition has been started. Each of the daughters brings some cookies when we all get together for Christmas. I am wearing... my favorite jeans, a black fleece shirt and pink striped knee socks. Even if I always wear jeans and a plain shirt, my socks are usually festive! I am creating... Anna's sweater, I am almost don...

Will I ever have everything ready when Advent begins? After searching in the chilly attic for the candles which I thought I saved, I came to the conclusion that we do not have Advent candles. The best I could do after several stores today was this.... At least we are ready for the Second Sunday of Advent. We did do the meditations a few nights this week, but somehow it was not the same without the candles.

--1-- We are dropping like flies around here. I am pretty sure it is just a cold, but it is packing quite a punch. In the immortal words of my husband as he ate food from the plate of one of the infected kids, "I never get sick". Guess who went down next? Sophie and I are still healthy but shaking in our boots. --2-- I am feeling spiritually lost this week as I cannot find my December Magnificat. I think I remember seeing it come in the mail, but now it has disappeared. I have been reading other religious material, but I miss my Magnificat. I like how it sits in my hands, the delicate pages and the hope those pages bring each time I open them. --3-- All the hassle of the DMV last week was almost worth it, Sophie's face lit up when she received her learner's permit in the mail yesterday. Here is a recap of events (if you are on Facebook, you can skip this): Things I learned at the DMV today: 1. pack a snack! 2. if you think you will accomplish everything in the seco...

We are using this wonderful series from CHC as our reading program. Today we were playing the name game on the back. Anna is supposed to pick a letter and add it to the end sound to make words. She sounded out C-O-T. I asked her if she knew what a cot was. She replied, "Of course. Like "caught" up in a rope."

Without giving too much information, my 17 year old daughter has been experiencing irregular cycles. Enough to make me worry. When I took her to the military clinic this morning, the doctor immediately wanted to put her on oral contraceptives to "regulate" her cycles. No tests, no bloodwork, just straight to pills. Am I overreacting? I find this appalling that the medical profession goes for the easy "put a band-aid on it" fix rather than trying to find the solution to a problem. After explaining that I was not comfortable with this option, he reluctantly ordered blood tests to check for any abnornmalities. We should hear something by tomorrow. Unfortunately, I am not surprised by this visit. There has been only one doctor in the last 7 years that I felt did a thorough job and took the time to really listen and diagnose my children's ailments. This is not a good percentage, in my opinion.

With the beginning of Advent here, I have been wondering how to prepare my heart for Jesus. I know, I should probably think of these things before Advent begins. That is another bad habit that needs changing, but one thing at a time. Having a heart full of love seems to be where I was led, and believe me the Spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak my friend. I had a beautiful day yesterday, however, the moment when love was truly required, did I respond with love? Sadly, I did not. All the intentions to spread love to others was gone as soon as someone was less than kind to me. So, today, I will try again. Prayers will be graciously accepted!

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend with my husband's family. Not only did we celebrate Thanksgiving, we also celebrated my mother-in-law's 80th birthday. Over 100 family and friends came together for this occasion! This is Eileen with all the grandchildren and a few nieces too! The day after Thanksgiving, we avoided the shopping craziness and went to the Museum of Natural History in DC. The kids decided to check out the dinosaurs first... and then onto the rocks and minerals.... and of course we saw the elephant! After 3 full days of fun and excitement, I can honestly say that there is truly no place like home!

the poems just kept flowing! Lemon squeeze, lemon squeeze, How many lemons? Just one. Bananas, bananas How many bananas? Just ten. Ice cream, ice cream Melt in the sun. Ice cream, ice cream Who will eat the ice cream? Meanwhile, Jack discovered the Hokey-Pokey today. He is a cute dancer, I must admit.

Anna bounded up to me, obviously with something big to share. Did I want to hear a poem? I was not aware she knew any poetry. No, these are not well-known verses, these are Anna's own musings: Rainbow, rainbow, after the rain Rainbow, rainbow, rain. A Winter Poem Snowman in the sun You will melt like ice cream in the sun. A Summer Poem Summer, summer, sun is up Summer, summer, wear some summer clothes Cold, cold, cold Not summer anymore Wear a warm long-sleeve shirt Or you will get shivering cold. Summer, summer, don't wear long sleeves Wear some short sleeves. Did you pick up on the theme? She is unhappy that summer is a long way off and she must wear warmer clothing. This all comes from living in southern Georgia for the past 7 years, where there are not distinct seasons. One can wear short sleeves year round. Sorry Anna, we are not in Georgia anymore.

FOR TODAY(November 23)... Outside my window...gray skies and damp, trampled leaves. I am thinking...about all the food I will prepare for family this week. I am thankful for...the soothing quality of a favorite song. From the learning rooms...a shortened number of days to work with. I am wearing...an old, comfortable sweat shirt, jeans and socks on my cold toes. I am creating...a gift for my mother-in-law for her 80th birthday. I am going...to the library! I am reading...A Tale of Two Cities I am hoping...to be a source of encouragement for someone close to my heart. I am hearing...the gentle, swirling water and the hum of the spin cycle in the washing machine. Around the house...children scattered about in various stages of morning chores. One of my favorite things...the picture of Our Lady of Guadalupe that was gifted to me by my most thoughtful sister-in-law. A few plans for the rest of the week: to be truly thankful for each moment, to take a meal to the neighbors who just welcomed...

--1-- I find it ironic that my "quick takes" post will probably be my longest post so far! --2-- I am still learning about all the wonderful advent traditions out there. Should I try to pick one or two to keep from being overwhelmed? Will I feel guilty if don't do all of them? I want to help my family prepare their hearts for Christmas without feeling stressed myself. --3-- I love getting mail. Personal mail, not junk mail and bills, those are not fun or uplifting. My mother-in-law sends me a weekly letter. I look forward to checking the mail each Thursday. There it is! A manilla envelope with a letter for me written on the outside of a small white envelope. Inside my letter are coupons she thinks I might use. Plus the Sunday comics from her paper for the kids. Some weeks there will be other little surprises too. --4-- I like bamboo knitting needles better than metal ones. The metal kind seem cold and loud. Bamboo feels soft and warm and quiet, just how knitting should be...

As Jack and Anna were playing with Ben's track, it almost seemed like he was playing with them. This is another thing I am thankful for, that even though I can't see him, I feel his presence in so many things we do.

I started knitting shortly after we lost Ben. It has been a sort of therapy for me. I am not a great knitter, (I look up how to do things frequently), but that does not matter. It is calming to my mind and soul. There are always some needles and yarn in my purse, for when my husband is driving or I have to wait in an office. One of the first things I knitted was a wool diaper cover for my cloth diapers. I figured it did not have to look perfect to do its job! There have been hats, dishcloths, toys, and currently I am attempting a sweater for Anna. This will have to sit in my knitting bag for a few days though, because today I felt that God wanted me to make a tiny blanket for a friend who lost the baby she was carrying. It is a small gesture that I hope will let her know I am grieving with her.

FOR TODAY Monday November 16... Outside my window...The sun is finally back, and the sky is so bright and blue. I am thinking...of the busy week ahead and praying for the extra energy I will need. I am thankful for...my children, who always keep things lively and interesting. From the kitchen...are slim pickin's, the commissary trip is today! I am wearing...jeans and a t-shirt with a light cardigan to keep the early morning chill away. I am creating...a sweater for Anna, though it seems like it might be small. I am going...to register at our new parish. I am reading...the Magnificat. I am hoping...to keep all students on task today. I am hearing...Anna making up a song while she plays in the other room. Around the house...laundry to fold and puzzles on the floor. One of my favorite things...the cozy, comforting feeling I get from looking at my walls with their fresh moss green paint. A few plans for the rest of the week: daily Mass at least twice, college applications for Sophie, a...

This morning, Jack was walking around in circles saying "wine.....wine....wine..." in a slow monotone voice. I asked him, "What are you doing"? His reply? "I'm whining, Mom"!

Sometimes I feel like my thoughts escape me before I even fully realize the thought itself. They are so fleeting. So are those small moments of each day with my children. My goal is to chronicle these ideas and moments, so when I start wondering whether or not I have lost my mind, I can find and enjoy them all over again.